How to Travel With Friends, Partners and Acquaintances: Tips + Tricks to Help You Not Want to Throat Punch Your Travel Buddies
Unless you are traveling solo, there will come a time when someone you are traveling with will start to annoy the shit out of you. Maybe it’s your friends’ friend who they invited, or in our case, Audriana and I just spending SO much time together that we start to get on each other’s nerves.
We have both traveled with people who weren’t necessarily our fav person on planet earth, and have become frustrated and have let it annoy us to the point that we weren’t fully enjoying the experience. Which is stupid and regrettable, because it’s your trip you’ve been looking forward to and saving money for, and letting someone spoil your experience is never worth it.
So, we’re going to share our best tips and tricks for getting through a trip when you’re with someone who you don’t particularly LOVE. And even for those trips you take with your best friend, traveling can be stressful as shit and you’ll most likely end up being pissed off at one another for awhile at some point.
GET TO KNOW THEM, BEFORE YOU GO!
Know what you are getting into before you head out on a big trip with someone you don’t know very well. You don’t necessarily have to know someone before you book a trip with them, but DO know them.
If you are going on a trip with a few girls and you know all of them but one, you should make an effort to hang out with the group as a whole before you all leave.
Go grab some coffee with the WHOLE group, go out to dinner, or the bars and spend some time with the people you’ll be traveling with. Even if you find out then you don’t particularly like them that much, you at least have some time to come up with a strategy or mindset to still enjoy yourself when you DO have to travel with them.
The goal of this is to find out what they do or don’t like to do. You can get a general idea of what kind of person they are, and subsequently what bothers you about them. In this way, you are helping yourself prepare for a trip with someone you may not love.
Not everyone wants to go out to the clubs, and drink and stay up until 7 AM. Some people want to do that occasionally and some people would be okay doing that every night of your trip. Understanding these differences in people is key. That way, there’s no tension or arguing when someone doesn’t want to participate -- you’ve already set that expectation and are prepared for it.
I think the problem comes when people who are patently different and like different things are kinda being forced to do things they don’t particularly enjoy. We’ll give you our own examples and how we handled them:
Example: While I (Angela) enjoy going out and making new friends and staying up late, I don’t really want to do it that often. I’m not really into going to clubs anymore, but if it’s the right circumstances and it’s fun, I’m all for it.
I DON’T like doing it that often and I would rather go to a quieter bar, make some friends and get up early and go do stuff -- so I get notoriously cranky when I feel like I’m forced to do things I don’t really want to do. In Thailand, Audriana and our other friend wanted to stay out at the club and have fun and I was READY to get the F out of there. Instead of staying and just being annoyed, I said goodbye to them and went back to our hostel!
And when they wanted to sleep in, because they were out late, that’s fine, too. It gives me a chance to get up early and go grab breakfast and do some exploring on my own.
The key is to learn to not get pissed off because people are different than you! You can avoid a lot of these conflicts and annoyances just by knowing not everyone wants to do the same thing as you.
BE PREPARED + THINK AHEAD
If you realize after you’ve spent some time with those you’ll be traveling with, that you do not care for someone who is joining you on your trip, remind yourself what they are like and think about ways you might deal with what bothers you about them. It sounds rude, but if you think of ways that might help you get less annoyed with someone then this could end up being really helpful.
Have some quiet time to yourself
If you are feeling tired of someone in your group, skip out on dinner with the group that night. Instead, take this time to relax on your own; quiet time does ya good! Even one night away from the group can make a huge difference. If you are only traveling with ONE person, this can be extremely helpful. A crucial mistake we see people make all the time is that they think they have to spend every waking second with the person, or people, they are traveling with.
Think about the things you DO like about them. If you are constantly thinking what you dislike about them on your trip, it definitely does not help. It doesn’t help the situation to be a caddy bitch about the person you don’t like -- but, it WILL ruin your time and the time of the people you do like to be constantly bitching about someone, or something. You don’t want your memory, and everyone else’s memory to be constant complaining, or annoyance with people in the group.
DON’T HOLD A GRUDGE!
Listen, I don’t mean to toot our horn about this, but Audriana and I are ah-mazing about not holding a grudge. We can notoriously be arguing and going at it like siblings, and 10 minutes later be totally fine and laughing again. RARELY are we actually, legitimately pissed off at the other to the point that it’s worth holding on to.
Remember, as fucking annoying as you may find someone in that present moment, I find that these emotions are amplified during travel. By this, I mean, you’re pissed off at your best friend because she’s not as excited to see the Eiffel Tower and you’ve been wanting to see it for years (see below story). In that moment, that’s a freaking 10/10 on the annoyance level. But, take some time to think about the positives — you’re in fucking PARIS with your best friend. You don’t have to go to work in the morning. You can drink wine and eat cheese literally all day if you want.
Just keep in mind that those things that are pissing you the shit off in that moment are almost never actually a big deal!
REMEMBER TO HAVE FUN, YOU ARE SEEING THE WORLD!
This is your trip, too! You looked forward to it, planned it, and saved your hard-earned money to be there, so you deserve to enjoy your time!
As annoying as you may find someone, and no matter how many times you find yourself upset, please remember:
YOU DID NOT COME ALL THIS WAY, WORK HARD TO SAVE MONEY, AND LOOK FORWARD TO THIS FOR THIS LONG, TO BE PISSED OFF.
Have a glass of wine and relax. If you’re in Paris, take a damn moment and relish in that fact.
Our example: The very first time we both saw the Eiffel Tower, we were both pissed off at each other. Like the kind of pissed off where I am angry speed-walking in front of Audriana and hoping she gets lost in the crowd and I never have to see her stupid face again. Why were we that mad at each other?
Well, because I was REALLY excited to be in Paris — I had been wanting to go for years and I was finally there! I was excited to try speaking French, to try the pastries, to see all the sights, and to hangout at the Eiffel Tower, of course.
Audriana, on the other hand, was wholly un-impressed with Paris and she was sure to let me know at every turn that it was just…meh.
I am actually getting re-angry typing this just thinking about it because, HOW IS PARIS JUST..MEH?!
But, how stupid, right?! We were at one of the most iconic sites in the world, it was night time, so the Eiffel Tower was sparkling in all her glory and I had been looking forward to seeing that for like...years! And that’s my memory of the first time seeing the Eiffel Tower -- being annoyed with one another and not even fully enjoying that experience. SO, don’t let that be you!
If you are traveling with your close friends, a group or ACQUAINTANCES:
Give each other space
You won't always agree and you WILL argue
Meet each other in the middle. You want to get up super early and they want to sleep in for a bit? Maybe one day you wake up early and one day they let you sleep in, or choose a time in-between each of your desired times!
Let it go! If you’ve been friends for a long time, a stupid argument is not worth holding onto.
Laugh about your mistakes! Audriana and I have made SO many mistakes that set us on edge at the moment — pissed off at ourselves for making a dumb mistake, pissed off at one another for causing us to make a mistake….but most of them are actually pretty funny, so have a laugh and move on!
Meet other people and make friends. This is one of our go-to’s! When we’ve had enough of each other, we’ll make friends at our hostel, or find some friends out in the world and spend some time with other people — it’s always refreshing and then we have something new to talk about with each other.
If you are traveling with your partner:
Remember you don’t have to do EVERYTHING together — shocker, right?!
Go on a date! Spend a day doing your own thing and exploring and then make plans to go on a date in the evening. Pick a place you both are excited to try in whatever beautiful city you’re in and have an awesome dinner.
Don’t stress. It is SO easy to stress out when you are traveling with your partner. I also think there’s a lot of pressure put on couples to have the best time ever, or else…you don’t really love each other, or something? It’s okay to have a bad time. It’s okay to be fucking pissed at your boyfriend or girlfriend. It’s NOT okay to stay mad, or just be an asshole for non-serious arguments! You (probably) love that person, so keep things in perspective!
Traveling with other people can be difficult, but it is worth it! You learn a lot while traveling solo, but you also learn so much while traveling with others. Some people prefer solo travel, and while I do like it, I do prefer to travel with other people. We have both traveled with people we didn’t really like and we’ve also spent plenty of time annoyed at one another for stuff we can’t even remember now -- BUT the things we remember most from those trips is still all the fun stuff and we have fond memories of those trips.
And though we don’t want to put yourself in the situation of traveling with people that we don’t necessarily care for… sometimes it does accidentally happen. And even if you like someone, there is most likely going to be times when you don’t like each other.
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